The article in Woman’s World sparked local interest in my journey, and being interviewed for a couple of local news outlets led me down memory lane to back to the beginning. I’ve been randomly humming Do-Re-Mi as I’m going throughout my day (“Let’s start at the very beginning….a very good place to start….). And, considering my recent struggle with sticking to healthy choices in the face of COVID-19 restrictions and feeling like I have nothing to look forward to other than something decadently delicious, it is an opportune time to go back to the beginning and revisit my strategies!
If you’re interested in checking out those two local news articles, you can find them as follows:
There’s some nuggets of wisdom these articles – the most important of which, in my opinion, is LOVE YOURSELF NOW! For years, I intellectually knew what had to be done. I was the “fat kid” my whole life – if anyone knew what I should and should not have been eating, it was me. I’d tried all sorts of exercise – you’d never know it by the time I was a teenager, but I was actually a summer athlete as a kid. I rode a 10-speed bike 4.5 miles to town (on gravel roads no less – y’all are spoiled with your mountain bikes!), did public swimming for a couple hours, speed swimming club for another hour, and then rode the 4.5 miles home. Being in the pool was my happy place and, despite not having the typical tall lanky swimmer’s physique, I was actually good at it!
Circa 1982 – Melfort Provincials……I think…….top of the podium!
So, yeah, I knew what was required to lose weight. But we all know that “knowing” and translating that knowing into action are two totally separate things. So I considered what changed. I considered what made it possible for me to actually commit to making positive changes this time. Why, after 20 years of failed attempts at dieting and exercising, did things finally stick?
The answer is so simple – but achieving it is anything but easy. About five years before I even made the decision to drop some weight, I decided I was going to learn to love myself as I was. In whatever moment I was in. I was going to stop berating myself for being “weak” and “undisciplined” and “fat” and “ugly”, and I was going to love me. I was going to stop listening to the bullies from my youth – I’d given them too much brain space over the years already. I decided I was AWESOME. I was WORTHY. I was SMART. I was CAPABLE. It didn’t matter what my physical shell looked like – I was all of those things regardless. If other people thought that my physical shell somehow made me less…well, I would prove them wrong. We all know that it’s pretty damn hard to shut childhood bullies up when they have dominated your self-talk for many years, and it took a good long time of me telling myself that I loved myself for me to actually BELIEVE and internalize that I loved myself, but it happened.
And when it happened, that was the magical thing that allowed me to make positive changes – because I finally believed that I deserved those positive changes, that I was worthy of those positive changes, that it didn’t mean that I was dishonoring myself to want to make those positive changes. This is the step that is so often overlooked. You can know exactly what you should eat. You can know exactly how much you should exercise. But until your mind is in the right place, none of that knowledge is going to do one damn bit of good.
Love you. Because you are AWESOME and you deserve to be loved. And once you believe that, it’s a lot easier to stop punishing yourself with poor choices – because you’ll believe that YOU DESERVE BETTER!
This is just my advice based upon my own personal journey – but, hey, since when would advice to “love yourself” be considered ill advised?
Grateful for wisdom from someone who has blazed the path I’m now trying to forge myself. Tough slogging, but I like your approach. Heard you on CBC this afternoon, and appreciated the way you patted yourself on the back for anything you did – I bought an exercise bike this week, and it arrived two days ago. I managed – pushing myself – to bike for 5 minutes yesterday. Got off the bike thinking, “Holy S£$T, I wonder how long it will be before I can do more.” But tomorrow, when I get on it again, I will use kinder self-talk. Thanks for that. And congrats on your amazing weight loss – and yes! Go bungy jumping as soon as you can! You’ll rock it! (I’m not sure about bungy jumping, but I have to say, zip-lining is on my list!) Cheers.
Thank you for your kind comment! When I started, I’m not sure I could have even gone 5 minutes on an exercise bike, so good on ya!! Keep it up – because soon it will be 10, then 15, then 30…and then you’ll never know how you made it through life without daily exercise! You got this – it is possible! Best of luck finding what works for you on your journey. Take care!